Journal Entry Type #47: Dating? Who Needs It? Not Me!

Is it Thursday already? Has four days gone by without blogging? Yes and yes. What have I been doing in these four days? The usual of working (as most of us know takes up much of our time) and then when I am done with work, I admit I’m finding myself too tired mentally and physically to blog or do much of anything else. It really feels as if I’m fighting an uphill battle right now with motivation and the courage/whatever else it is to have consistency. I sometimes feel as if my life is a revolving door and in many ways it is: waking up, eating, working, more eating, more working, and a lot of the same after work. I’ve been excited to blog about certain topics and others not so much that I once had excitement for and lately having the issue of ending my sentences with prepositions. The thing most writers of the past and what I learned in school that it is wrong. It is a major grammatical wrong. Sort of like beginning a sentence like this or using the word ain’t. My favorite saying when it comes to the word “ain’t is this: “aint, ain’t a word.” Someone must have said that to me along time ago and it stuck. The same goes for when my teacher in middle school questioned why I said “hate” instead of “dislike.” Her stance was it was such a word with strong meaning behind it.

This image has an empty alt attribute; its file name is whothebleep.jpg

Okay, so back to dating. I’ve been there. I’ve done it. I’ve had disastrous dates. I’ve had dates that ended pretty quickly. I’ve had ones that never went past the first one. I thought I’d live my life as a single person and die equally as a single person. Then, I moved to CA for a much different reason but left CA with the person I met there. It is just the way it happened. I’m not getting into the belief that everyone has a soul mate because I’m not sure where I stand on the matter. I haven’t given it that much deep thought. I know one of my past professors thought human beings randomly picked someone as their mate. Basically, there was nothing special to picking someone, like random balls bouncing off one another, and even more random sticking to another ball/person. Once I find myself single, I probably won’t want to go on a date or be with someone again. I’m hoping I’m old and wrinkly at this point but it takes a lot of energy and time to date and get to know someone. Some people like the excitement of first meetings and the butterflies in your stomach with anticipation. It’s a good feeling to have but as with anything good, the opposite bad can happen.

All you have to do is watch any given TV show about terrible dates such as Who the Bleep and Dates from Hell to know some people have bad intentions. The ones that stick out to me because I’ve seen the stories on more than one crime show is Mark Twitchell (the filmmaker that wasn’t) and Philip Markoff (the Craigslist Killer). As I watched them, I was so thankful I ended up with a person who gives me space, lets me do my own thing, and doesn’t have a need to be glued to my side all the time. The reality is over the years we’ve gotten even closer despite spending less time together for a variety of reasons. We both work at home, we have our own interests, and we don’t want to be in each other’s faces all the times. Even when we worked in separate places, we still spent more time alone than together. I firmly believe couples need to have their own identity and while this may be a non brainer statement, some don’t have that luxury or separation. I’ve tried the online dating thing way back when and I ended up meeting a friend out of the whole experience. I’m not sure if I’ll ever do the single and mingle thing again, but I stand by the view of nothing is forever, not even marriage. With this in mind, I prefer to keep my independence as much as possible but having the ability to rely on particular someone is good too.

This image has an empty alt attribute; its file name is datesfromhell.jpg

So my short, dating advice is this. If you want to date someone who others view as a freak, so be it. If you want to date someone younger (not too young) or older than you, whatever floats your boat. If you want to do something you’ve never done before on a date (obviously killing and hurting someone isn’t applicable), do it. The bottom line is do what makes you feel good about yourself. Be careful but not so extreme that everyone is a predator or greedy. If the latter half of my life is how I envision it to be, I hope never to date again. If I ever find myself on the dating scene, I wish myself good luck. Anything can happen either way. I suppose this leads to more simple advice of just living and seeing what happens.

Weekly Facts #24

McDonald’s is not known for their healthy food. The menu item with the most calories seems to be the large triple thick raspberry milkshake at 1,090 calories although if you eat anything in large portions, it will pack a bunch of calories. The breakfast meals, frappes, and large orders of any menu item will put you over the top for daily calories by the end of the day.

Any free-moving liquid including water will form itself into a sphere in outer space. This is because of its surface which is like an elastic skin.

It would take around and hour for an object to fall to the deepest part of the ocean although this is depending on the weight of the object among other factors.

Brazil is the larger than all the 48 contiguous states in the United States. Brazil has a landmass of about 3.53 million square miles where the US (contiguous) has around three million square miles.

The brain tells your body how to function by nerves. The brain has four lobes: front, parietal, occipital, and temporal. It uses about 25% oxygen in order to work properly. If it doesn’t get that amount it goes into cerebral or brain hypoxia.

Poem: Number One

Fractions, multiplication, decimals with addition,
I come to you with a plea.
Help me unwarp my jumbled mind and
let me rest for a moment or two.
I cannot do it alone and it's dark during the day.
Dropped off numbers, pulled too far away, 
the next column reeks of confusion, 
following much too close behind me.
It is here where my loyalty decides,
my next move in the direction of a few and I 
come to you with an answer and some solace.
Four plus five is nine, minus two is seven,
add back three and the answer is ten.
Here is where my threshold rests, 
no more and no less, the number ten.
Don't leave me hanging, your straight line
is what I need to continue.
The dotted line could soon appear for both
of us but only one figure is needed.

Five Mid-June Quotes

Five Forbes Quotes

Lazy Sunday with Games

A few weeks ago, I realized I never included Tetris in my short lived game playing. It was one of the greatest games ever invented although Wheel of Fortune and Monopoly belong in the pile too. I had all intentions of biking at Lake Mead, the weather wasn’t going to be too hot (mid 90s) but due to my not feeling well, I laid low. I hardly did anything yesterday due to my inability to sleep (felt achy and pukey). I’m feeling better today but still not feeling 100%. Then again, it’s been a while since I’ve felt 100%. Anyway, I preferred playing Wheel of Fortune over Monopoly and the card game Uno is good too. A new week starts tomorrow and I’m hoping for a more productive one on certain levels. In due time but eventually 2020 will turn into 2021 and I will be focused on new projects (I hope).

Poem: Basket Case

Weaving a basket takes time,
in and out,
out and in.
Fingers working the fiber,
back and forth,
forth and back.
Little rest in between,
up and down,
down and up.
Less time with food,
bite and swallow,
swallow and bite.
Moving basket to another place,
one and two,
two and one.
Overcome with many baskets,
vertical and horizontal,
horizontal and vertical,
There is always room for more,
worn and separated,
separated and worn.

Journal Entry Type #46: Seven Topics

Topic One: Hackers — I don’t like most of them because not only do they try to get into my email accounts but other things of mine on social media. I’ve adopted the two factor authentication or as I call it two tier authentication for most of my things after realizing people have too much time on their hands. I keep getting notices that my Apple account has been breached. Whatever, Heather. Ah, no it hasn’t. Please go away.

Topic Two: Dreams — Jeez, I have some messed up dreams. I had a long one two nights ago. I’m not going to go into it, but talk about being in one location, then another one, and yet another one. Take it from me, my mind is warped for many reasons or put another way operates differently it seems (good and bad). It’s great for creativity and storytelling but bad when I’d rather not think about certain things I will always be thinking about off and on during my lifetime. It’s just the way it is. I’m still trying to find a way to paint my life on a canvas with too much energy floating around in every which way. Not now but maybe one day.

Topic Three: Capitalism — I’m currently reading a book that touches upon it and have yet to read another book on it, but damn, the United States, really loves capitalism. Work even harder for a few more dollars more and it has dawned on me that in the U.S. most of us work for 30 to 50 years of our lives and will never reach the kind of money we would like to have. I always thought I’d wait until I retire to travel, but I’m rethinking this. I don’t have a lot of extra money lying around and if I did, who knows what I’d really do with it. Actually, I do but I’m too tired to go into it when it’s just a pipe dream. With my arthritis acting up and the extra white hairs I’m getting (probably due to 2020 stress and the fact I’m also getting older), I better get my ass out there and travel while I’m somewhat vertical and can see and hear somewhat decent.

Topic Four: Aging — This goes with the above where aging happens to everyone and yes, it really does suck in a lot of ways. I never thought my knees would hurt when I turned 40. I never thought my fingers would morph into ugly twigs. I never thought my feet would cause problems in my ankles and legs. I never thought I’d go through three surgeries. I never thought I’d have problems with ears. I never thought I’d have skin issues (thanks to the damn desert).

Topic Five: Procrastination — I’m becoming less of a procrastinator because it doesn’t bother me as much anymore. If I don’t feel like doing something, so what? I’m doing what I can and putting things into deeper perspective. These are tense times as well as transitory times. Nothing lasts forever although some things do, but when you factor in the human life expectancy, I’m so glad human beings do not live very long. It would suck to be a vampire and never die. I do what I can and if I don’t get to something, there always be another day ahead in the general sense.

Topic Six: Censorship — I find myself having issues with people wanting to deem other things whether it be writing, movies, artwork, or anything creative as no longer valid or appropriate. I get that movies done in the past were of the times. I’m thinking of Gone with the Wind or Breakfast at Tiffany’s but it’s a damn slippery slope. The Guggenheim Museum in 2017 decided not to show video titled “Dogs That Cannot Touch Each Other” in the exhibition titled “Art and China after 1989” in 2017. I don’t condone dog fighting in any way and while the dogs were trying to get at each other on non running treadmills, I wonder what was the purpose of it truly was during the conception, filming, and end piece. If it was to bring awareness to dog fighting and its negative effects, then yes, there are more constructive ways to do this. Certain art forms take a lot more talent and devotion than others and some forms are better than others, but I’m not snooty enough to say one shouldn’t exist over the other. Again, it’s a slippery slope. Ceramics is a great way to release stress and great arm strength builders. I had the strongest arms when I threw clay. I’d venture to say someone making pots and cups will be thought of as a better ceramist versus one that creates phallic symbols of different sizes. Yet, they are both creative acts that take time and energy. I guess what I’m saying is even the things deemed no longer relevant in current times do have some relevancy. It doesn’t mean it’s all good, but I don’t want to live in a world where only certain things can be expressed and all others are discarded or pushed under the rug.

Topic Seven: Social Media — The pluses and minuses of social media are plenty, but it really seems people have taken judge, jury, and executioner to a whole different level. Back in the day, you couldn’t film someone without their consent. Nowadays with cell phones and easy access to social media, it’s almost like I don’t want to go outside at all anymore. This is why I keep to myself more than ever right now, at least physically, because there’s stuff out there I’d rather not be around including the Coronavirus. Once in a while I have debates where people are getting fired from jobs due to the videos posted on social media by others. It spreads across the viewership and then the company finds out and soon the person is fired. While there is ample evidence the person usually is partially or fully at fault, it makes me wonder what kind of society we are becoming. It doesn’t mean I condone racist or sexist or any kind of unflattering words and behaviors, but I’m going to tell you right now, EVERYONE has skeletons in their closet. It’s okay to check other people’s behaviors (random strangers), but I think people are finger happy with their record button on their phones, at times. I’m not saying to stop recording things that are seriously messed up and used to protect yourself when nothing else has worked (such as talking to the other person), but I think there could be a little more discretion involved.

That’s all I have to say right now and what was on my mind. I hope everyone is having a productive week. With me, I’m busy, busy, and more busy. There’s too many things I want to do and not enough time, but as I said earlier, one day at a time. I’m sure there will be people who disagree with me because no two people think alike 100% let alone everyone in the world. There are many ways to arrive at the same thing and I’m hoping actual change begins to happen around the world. Less words and more action except when you’re writing because you then need more words and even more action.

Three Wannabe Bookmarks

Trifecta #36

%d bloggers like this: