Journal Entry Type #161: 16 days later, I’m still here!

It’s been half a month since I posted anything. It was freeing, beneficial, and helpful in many ways. Even though I had a yearning to get back to blogging, I had to step away for several reasons. One, I had family visiting for five days and spent time with my family versus burying my eyes and face inside my computer. Sometimes, I write things that no one reads because they don’t find it interesting or don’t care to read because they too have a life to live. I admit I spend the most time on FB in terms of social media and should be spending more time on WP instead. I should download the app on my iPhone because I might have a fighting chance to use WP more to my advantage.

Two, I went for a long weekend to CA and Los Angeles (Hollywood, Malibu, and North Hollywood in specific). I was a spur of the moment thing as my roommate had training in a suburb of Los Angeles County. It had been five years since being in CA and I loved every minute of it. I saw a kinds of things I don’t normally see including grass, trees, and bushes. I saw a car wedged under a semi-truck and too bad I didn’t take a photo of it. I know it’s bad to take a photo of something tragic but from what I saw the person was no longer in the car. Of course, I wouldn’t have taken it had the person still been in the car. It’s crazy how people in LV and LA drive as if they are in a movie. I call them Fast and Furious drivers and for people who ride motorcycles, the wannabe Tokyo drifters.

Three, there is realization I don’t need to post everything that happens to me or what I think is important in my life. I’ve stepped away from some things in my life no longer serving me or isn’t as relevant anymore. When I visited Hollywood and took a photo of the boarded up ArcLight, the day before I left on a plane back to LV, the screenwriters committed to striking. The last writer strike was about a year after I graduated from film school and so much has changed since that time. I didn’t become a famous screenwriter nor even a screenwriter, but now dedicating my time to novel writing and poetry (although not so much now). Those who are working screenwriters have had their source of income dwindle. They’ve had to work harder and longer to make ends meet. Long gone are the days of optioning a script or TV show idea for a million dollars. Long gone are the days of Quentin Tarantino being the norm.

That’s why they are striking, in order to get their due. The whole topic of AI in film (threatening actor and actress likenesses without getting paid) and computer systems to write the skeleton of a story without a human writer (threatening the need for human writers and creativity) is scary. It’s really become a reality for many unknown writers with substance (as I believe I’m a decent writer) that writing stories and finishing them because you like doing it must be enough. It should be enough because like the two CA lottery tickets I bought, the chances of winning are so slim that you (including me) should do for the fun of it. I know I keep harping on this point of enjoying what you have and what you can do in your life. There’s something to be said for balance and a good foundation. I’ve been off kilter a little bit and a part of my time away is needing time to myself. I don’t need to write or blog to get money although sometimes I wish I had the energy and drive to be more aggressive in my blogging.

My rewards are finishing my books and righting my wrongs. This is why I’m still alive. This is what my purpose is and while it has changed somewhat, I’m trying hard to believe I’m here for a reason. Maybe, I’m here because of a combination of luck and misfortune along with the ability to show my fortitude and tenacity. These three things I mentioned above means I love water and ocean water in particular, I love big cities and all it offers, and I love being a productive thinker as much as a non-productive doer (at times). Good luck to everyone as May turns into June. It will be here before you know it.

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