OFF WITH A BANG
Get a New Hobby
Spend Time with Family
We’ve all heard the common New Year resolutions. Every year they creep into our minds only to leave our minds before January ends. It looks great on paper. Some even write them down. I do before the New Year hits, and then every month to see if I’m on point, and 2017 I was off point more than on. Yes, things happen to get in the way along your path, but as we all know, you must keep moving forward. While I will always have specific resolutions and/or goals, I realize there’s something more important to focus on and it’s something within myself in 2018.
Because I’ve done quite a bit of promising something over and over and over again and often not committing to it or doing it in a timely manner, I realize I’m married to the word “promise” instead of the word “performance” when it comes to my personal life. I’ve done mind games, if you will, to shock my brain into a new way of thinking, in the hopes I will be able to view the action it takes to achieve my resolutions/goals as something natural and essential versus something forced and pointless. There are times I feel as if I’m a robot just going through the motions to get to my goals. I’d like to get away from this feeling completely, but being a human being comes with stubbornness. It takes time to change the way one thinks.
People often need to hear more than “take control” or “just do it” for it to sink in and then set in permanently. People have such a hard time with the top two resolutions of losing weight and exercising because the mental urgency and necessity isn’t there even when our body appearance and ailments tell us otherwise. It’s as if many of us are just trying to hang onto life by a thread, and therefore, junk food and sugary drinks are the only things bringing us the little comfort we seek. Yet, in the long run it proves to be more troublesome. Instant gratification comes to mind. We live in a society of “I want it now” instead of “I want it when the time is right.” I’ve done this before, both bad eating and impatience, when I’m not in the right mindset. Most all of us have all been there because humans are complex.
Resolutions and goals are good tools to use, but using them in the right way is necessary if they are to work at their best optimum. We walk a fine line between hopes and dreams on one side and despair and heartache on the other. How do you navigate when mentally you see parts of your life resemble a scene out of a bad horror movie? How do you pull yourself up by the bootstraps and not just live but really LIVE? How do you prevent falling further into the traps of the past? These are the questions I ponder as I’m gaining another year. I offer no easy solutions because there are none. Yes, there are some anomalies, but most of us are in the middle of the pack.
Life has never been “easy” for me. I’ve been through hell and back, and this was all before I was even adopted. Then, I spent the next thirty years trying to get back what I lost as as child, regaining some back, and other things will never be restored. The last eleven years is when I did the most personal growth, but it’s been hard at times. It takes damn hard work to be brutally honest with yourself. It takes even harder work to realize it isn’t all one person’s fault. There comes a time when you need to take responsibility for your beliefs and actions. I’m gaining even more acceptance of my shortcomings, forgiveness for those who betrayed me, and distancing myself from people and/or places that are toxic. As my head rests on my pillow, no one knows what is best for me except me (to an extent).
While there are some goals I didn’t accomplish in 2017, I intend to work weekly on them to get to that point of completion in 2018. Wishing and wanting something fall into your lap without any kind of work isn’t how it’s done. There are times what you want doesn’t happen. There are times what you try to prevent does happen. You need to be prepared for disappointment. I definitely learned this and accepted it (to an extent). You better love doing whatever you’re doing because the ultimate reality might be different from your vision. Let’s face it that life is tough, but this doesn’t mean you don’t go out there and give it your all. You should for many reasons. I know I am in 2018.
I leave this on a lighter note with a fashion no no. I learned while watching the news of a trend in 2017 I hope turns into a fad really soon. Since I’m past 40 now, fashion has to be practical for me, but not that I was ever a fashionista. These jeans aren’t practical. The Clear Knee Mom Jean? This is just stupid. Please make these plastic jeans go away. They aren’t attractive by any means. Now that I’ve said my peace, go out and by some jeans, but please NOT these.